Showing posts with label hold.. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hold.. Show all posts

Sunday, October 10, 2010

How often should we hold our babies?

How often do you hold your child? Can you hold a baby too much or too little?

I hold my baby when I nurse and when I write. Sometimes we cuddle before and after feedings. I’m not going to tell you how long that is for fear of your judgement, but let’s just say I hold him more hours than I sleep at night, OK?

What’s the optimal time for holding? And how do you factor in the time other people hold him?

I ask because sometimes I stick baby in his rocking baby chair and am immediately flooded with guilt. I like when company visits and holds him. That way I can use the toilet and not feel bad about it.

Baby websites and experts agree: you can’t spoil a baby. But is the opposite true? Can a mother not hold her child enough and deprive him of social development? interaction? human connection? does he think I don’t love him?

According to babycenter.com, http://www.babycenter.com/404_how-much-do-i-have-to-play-and-interact-with-my-baby-do-babi_6882.bc babies need some alone time to explore and play with toys.

My child hasn’t discovered his fingers yet. I think rattles and a jack-in-the-box are a little advanced for him.

I don’t know who James Prescott, Ph.D., is, but according to a couple websites, he said this: The single most important child rearing practice to be adopted for the development of emotional and social healthy infants and children is to carry the newborn/infant on the body of the mother/caretaker all day long…”

Like the advice of so many medical professionals, this too is conflicted.

So mothers and fathers, grandparents and caretakers of cyber world, what’s the answer? If baby hangs out in his rocking chair for a few hours, am I a bad mother? Will my child resent me? Will he never learn to bond with another human being? Or am I just  a new mom, paranoid and over thinking things. Please say “B.”